Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Rrrrggh! Eye see the problem.

Here's a little story, I know you've never heard. It's a true story with a very happy ending.

Once upon a time there was a girl with a crooked eye. Her eye looks acceptable cosmetically and all but her vision is quite the opposite. For most of her life she was diagnosed incorrectly and given prescriptions for glasses but none of them have actually resolved her vision woes. Because the tension of the muscle in her right eye is tighter than the tension in her left eye her vision in that eye pulls inward therefore making it impossible for her eyes to work in unison to make one clear picture. Instead the things she sees are terribly confusing, blurry or double. The confusion of images relayed to her brain often leave her with painful headaches and an unhappy attitude. Not wanting to let her eye get the best of her she developed her own crutches to get by with the annoying nag of an eye. She discovered that closing one eye would alleviate the double vision so long as the right eye remained clamped shut. She also found that intense focused squinting would satiate bombarding and conflicting images her eyes send to her brain. In some circumstances (when no one is there to witness) she will even secure random articles of clothing and accessories over the handicapped eye in place of an eye patch (rrrgh matey!) to give her mind a break from the world of chaos her eyes propose together. After years of frustration the girl was referred to a specialist who unbeknown to her was about to change her life forever. She waited the long amount of time (10 weeks) for her turn to meet with the specialist, hoping but also not expecting too much out of the visit. After some blinding test and some uncomfortable treatments a new diagnosis was made. The doctor revealed that her circumstance was not permanent and that her vision could be restored by a perfectly safe operation. She was elated! She wanted to leap into the lap of the blessed man who bore her such fabulous news and kiss him on his bald head (at least she thinks he was bald, she couldn't really see that well). Instead she said "Oh, how nice." as she smiled to herself and ignored the terrified cries of the other patients being mauled by Kingston in the waiting room. The doctor was then replaced by his assistant who scheduled the girl's operation. She left stunned and in awe that in just two weeks the plague of double vision will be lifted from her life and she will finally be able to do away with her makeshift eye patches and squinting faces. She is officially one HAPPY girl!

The End

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ps.

-yes, I just made a comic strip about my crooked eye.

- I think I should audition for a headache commercial. I felt like that picture was really believable.

- Rosette eye patches will be going on sale immediately.

- Just kidding on the part about selling eye patches, it's just a glamour band. Haha

14 comments:

Mallorey said...

I had the exact same thing!! I had my surgery 4 years ago. And what a relief! You will feel so much better. You will feel out of it the first day or so, but back to normal in a week.

Good luck!! If you have any questions about it, just let me know!!

emily said...

Hee Hee your so silly. I, thankfully, have been blessed with excellent vision but bad teeth in return. So happy you got some news back. Good luck with surgery!! Yay for no more headaches and no more eye patches! Ah what a relief!

Michelle said...

Lots of luck Becki. Sending good thoughts your way for a speedy recovery.

Allison said...

Best wishes for an easy surgery and quick recovery! You are beautiful, and I'm glad that you have the chance to see that beauty (and read!) without squinting or pain!

Unknown said...

Oh this is sooooo weird almost creepy. I was also at the eye dr today with some if the same problems no lie. I have some swelling they want to look at via mri. But we have the same crooked letter one eye worse than the other thing! Like I said super weird. Good luck!

Crissy said...

Oh, but you should come up with some fashionable eye patches to sell! No joke!! My young daughter is supposed to patch her eye several hours a day...the first eye patch we purchased at her dr's office was both "ugly" and uncomfortable, so she wouldn't wear it. A friend constructed a new one for her...very cute and fashionable, she wore it for a while but finally admitted it while it was more comfortable than the first, it also had comfort issues. I know where she went wrong and it could be easily remedied with a different fabric choice but she's a busy mommy of three (two with special needs) and I just can't bring myself to ask her to make another. Although, anyone who has ever seen the fashionable eye patch she made has LOVED it and gotten so excited at the idea they might, too, be able to purchase something cute to fulfill their child's needs. You should totally try producing some eye patches. Who better than someone who truly understands the need.

Stephanie McDonnell said...

Seriously, Becki, Halloween is coming up. What better way to top off all those sexy pirate costumes than with a Whippy Patch?
Come on, you know you want to!

P.S. I know that is something you've struggled with for so long--longer than I've known you. I'm glad that someone finally had an answer for you. God bless that doctor and his joy for the practice. I will pray for you in the upcoming weeks as your operation takes place.

Kevin and Crystal Whitlock said...

That sounds alot like what Luke just got surgery for. Good luck :)Glad we found his so early.

Jill said...

Great news! I had the same problem as a child... I had to wear an eye patch for 2 years and it corrected the lazy eye.

My youngest daughter also has this problem. She went through a year and a half of wearing an eye patch for 2 hours a day. That didn't work, so now I put dilation drops in her good eye 3x a week so that her weak eye is forced to do all of the work. It bugs her that her good eye is blurry!! We have been doing this for a year now... The doctor said that surgery is the last and final option. I think I'm about ready for her to have the surgery so that she is all better soon!

Good luck!

Jennifer said...

The flower eye patch would have made me spit coke all over my computer screen if i was drinking at the moment. I hope your ojo feels better soon!

Anonymous said...

yay for your soon-to-be-found freedom from unnecessary pain! The reality is...if you tell us fancy eye patches are in....we'll wear them.

Steven and Keeley said...

You look like Cameron Diaz in the "Ummmm" picture! That's a good thing by the way. I think she's adorable. Glad your eye is or will be better! Take care!

Jessica I. said...

I had that surgery too! The best part is that I now have some amount of depth perception (which I didn't have when seeing with one eye at a time - both of my eyes had the problem). I do still blame my...lack of gracefulness, shall we say...on my "eye condition" ;)

Codi said...

If my son was a girl, he'd definitely get one of your awesome "patches!" He will also be having the surgery soon. Good luck to you!!